Let's Make A Deal

In the beginning.  This was my first attempt to record the many messages and happenings on the trail.  I felt compelled to write this particular one down.   In part because of its miraculous nature and also to insure that I never forget.   Time has a way of fading and blurring the details.  The more distance between the experience and everyday life, the less impact these special moments seem to carry.  This is a very exceptional story in my life and one I never get tired of reliving.  Every time I read this story, the emotions flood in and remind me of the magnitude.  The lessons continue to this day, uncovering more depth, clarity and understanding.   A homework assignment that never ends from the greatest Teacher of all. 

I did not date this journal entry and relying on my memory is always a bit sketchy.  Due to the crazy swing in weather, my guess is sometime in March or April.   Don’t like the weather?  Wait 5 minutes and check again.  The unpredictability of nature in the springtime is pretty much guaranteed.  I also did not snap any photos.  There was not even a thought to take one.  The magic was too great to be captured and there was no time to dilly dally.  On with the show… 

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I am fortunate to pass by a beautiful trailhead on my way home from work.  This mountain has been a mainstay for years, but lately my consistency has been lacking.   The hike is fairly steep with switchbacks all the way to the top and my endurance is not at optimal performance.   Hiking shoes and a change of clothes are in the car, ready for any opportunity to strike so I can hit the trail and regain my former fitness level.  The only thing striking today, however, is thunder and lightning.   Disappointed but hopeful, I watch the hourly forecast as the day rolls along.   Maybe this storm will pass, although the skies aren’t looking very agreeable to my suggestion.

Leaving work, there’s plenty of daylight remaining, but I must concede.   Rain, wind and cranky dark clouds are interfering with my best laid plans.   Just when my motivation ramps up, Mother Nature turns the tables.  Getting back into the swing of hiking, my excitement and enthusiasm are blocked by the weather.  Times like these test our resolve, I guess.   Am I really serious about this goal?  Yes, I’ll try again tomorrow.

As the mountain comes into closer view, the clouds appear thinner, less ominous.   Is that blue sky peeking through?  Oh yah, baby!  I’m doing this and the car happily pulls into the gravel lot.  A break in the storm and I’ll take it.  Quick shoe change and I’m off – keenly aware of the short window I’m trying to navigate.  Time is of the essence and weather can change on a dime.  There are only two cars in this normally packed lot and one is mine.  We are both crazy.

On a clear day and if conditions are just right, there is a spectacular view of The Mountain at the top.    The distance between the grassy landing and The Mountain is about 100 miles, much less as the crow flies.  Mt. Rainier in all her glory awaits fortunate hikers when she’s feeling social.  We simply refer to her as The Mountain with a capital M.  Her presence feels remarkably close and intimate from this vantage point.   After a steep trek, this is a perfect spot to catch your breath while her beauty calms the soul.  An elusive and not always guaranteed reward for the journey.  It’s a special treat to see that The Mountain is out. 

I begin my ascent with elation at this spontaneous chance to climb.  My current inability to make it to the top uninterrupted, that is, I usually have to stop once or twice to catch my breath, is concerning.   There is no time for such a luxury today and this dilemma looms large.  I look up.  Skies are mostly clear.   I throw caution to the wind and offer my proposal.  “If I can make it to the top without stopping, will you provide clear skies and a view of the The Mountain?”  The response is quick and clear.  “Yes.”  That’s all I needed to hear.  By hearing I don’t mean audible.   Heard from my heart, my center, a very loud and unmistakable answer to my quite bold question.   My request was not a demand or ultimatum, simply a playful game of “Let’s Make A Deal.”  The bargain was accepted and now I have a job to do, a promise to keep.

Ten minutes in and I’m breathing hard, just trying to put one foot in front of the other.  The deal was that I cannot stop moving and I slow my pace, steady my breath and carry on.   Not in my best physical shape and it’s biting me hard.  A good reminder to stay consistent.   One of the many lessons on the mountain today.

Continuing up I can feel the encouragement – even the birds are cheering.  Step, breath, step, breath – keep moving and stay focused.  I’m in my head now and wrestling with any rude intrusion of thoughts that could undermine my success.  Determined to keep my word, stopping is not an option, racing heartbeats are ignored and I methodically, slowly advance forward. 

The mountain is rarely this quiet, still and devoid of other people.  I cannot remember ever having this hike all to myself.  This adds to the mysterious blending of arrangements I find myself immersed in.  No distractions, no dog at my heels, nobody else is here, only deep connection and my desire to uphold my part of the bargain.  Step, breath, focus…repeat.

The last little bit is especially steep and difficult and concentration is intense – every ounce of energy is devoted to these final few yards.   As I approach the top I am out of breath completely.  I raise my eyes and can see clearly.  Blue skies welcome me and the sunshine smiles.  Mount Rainier stands proudly in full glory and I’m close to tears at this encounter of beauty, wonder and serenity.  Pausing to enjoy and appreciate the miracle that I know just happened, I wonder if there’s time to sit and meditate for a few minutes.  “No!” is the answer.  “Now get going.”  This is so strong and startling that I instantly respond “OK, OK, I’m leaving, but what’s the rush?”   No answer is given and the time for negotiating is over.  I must leave now.

Down is considerably faster.  I mix it up by jogging, walking and carefully treading upon any slippery, wet rocks.  The descent is a blast and the skies still look happy.   Occasionally I tilt my head and ponder the need to hurry along.  With no further instructions, I continue down and follow my orders.

Breathing is back to normal and energy has returned as I make my way to the parking lot.   There is only one car now.   I crack a smile at how strange and surreal the past 90 minutes has been.  Safely inside with seatbelt fastened I shift into drive and begin to pull away from this magical day on the mountain.   I'm startled as something hits the windshield hard. The skies have opened up wide and I mean big, heavy, drops of rain are pounding down upon my car before I’ve even left the gravel.  Wasn't the sky just blue?!   My wipers can barely keep up and are cranked to full power.   I gasp out loud, “Oh my.  This is why the rush.  Thank you.”   I am speechless, really.  Overwhelmed by the entirety of the experience and still am to this day.

Hiking on this particular trail is always a spiritual occasion and in part, why it’s so wildly popular most every day.   To have the climb all to myself was not the only gift.   Would I have been in tune with God without this level of solitude?  Would I have asked for help and boldly made a deal?  More importantly, would I have heard the answer?  We were joined and in sync and created within a dance of unity.   God wants this relationship and the answers to our questions are always available.  We don’t always have the capacity or willingness to hear them.   Distractions get in the way and we prefer to hear the answers we want – not the true wisdom and the ones provided. 

Today was playful and I’m reminded of this lighthearted side of Source.   The collaboration was beyond fun, stepping into the realm of bliss.   As I drove away from the mountain I was in awe for hours.  

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Now, years later I’m still struck by the magnitude of what happened and wonder why I consider this a one-off, an anomaly, unusual, once-in-a-lifetime mystical alliance?  What if these situations are supposed to be the standard operating procedure?  What if I’m so far disconnected that I think I’m balanced?  The separateness feels normal and the connection feels strange, unexpected and surprising.  I may have things backwards.  I probably have things backwards. 

More than merely some rain, clouds, mountains and sunshine. It was a question, a game, an agreement and answers between myself and God, Source, Consciousness. The name and labels are unimportant and insignificant. Choose what resonates with your heart and build a repour, a harmony, a togetherness.

I suspect there are deeper meanings yet to uncover.   It was so seamless and easy and comfortable.  How do I cultivate that link on a more consistent basis?  Bring this relationship into my daily life, decisions, struggles and triumphs?  Only a theory, but pretty sure this is up to me.  The connection is always available.  My job is to ask and then to actually (gasp) listen.

I encourage you to write down that story, that miracle, the synchronicity that cannot be explained away. Record it to keep it fresh, hold it near and dear and continue to discover the teachings. Write it down to remember the awe, the emotions and the powerful significance it played in your life. Relive that special moment that brought joy and helped you move forward. The one that touched your soul.

All too often we recount the not so positive happenings and they can be like commercials: irritating, repetitive, pointless and really loud and obnoxious. Turn them off in favor of the happy moments, miraculous connections and amazing life experiences. Write them down so you don't forget to finish the homework.