Not my job

The sunrise was nothing less then glorious. As the morning rays filtered through the lens of slowly passing clouds, they seemed to stop just long enough to enjoy this display of beauty that their mere presence was creating. Every moment reflecting a new configuration, more colors. Each traveling cloud contributing to the magical show as the sun slowly peaked above the horizon. Quiet and peaceful and coffee in hand, I was simply witnessing and offering gratitude for nature's play. Thankfully, my mind hadn't really woken up yet.

But then, it does awaken and the worry, to-do's and scheduling problems begin. Such a rude intrusion and contrast to the view presented before me. This is the real trouble and I'm tired of the chatter. It's exhausting and serves no purpose other than to annoy and remind me of what's not working well, needs fixing or dealing with. Very impolite, I say, and this is not helping and worse even still, probably hurting.

The Serenity Prayer reflects a fitting theme for the three words I now keep close and ready. If I am asking for God to grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference, then I'd best be paying attention to that wisdom piece. If it's something I cannot change, then I should not be wasting energy, physically or mentally. I'm not practicing the discerning wisdom needed.

Whenever the obsessive, runaway thoughts start sneaking in and looping on repeat, I stop and say the words. I interrupt, quite rudely sometimes, the needless worry about situations outside of my control. When I allow these loops to continue, I'm only getting in my own way and preventing what I do want.

My default mode, which can be both a super power and my kryptonite, is action. I like to do stuff. Finding a problem, or making one up, anticipating joy in figuring out the solution and getting down to work is alive and well and ready to jump. Considering all angles and possibilities, I can spend weeks, months, years, rolling different scenarios around, and around, and around. A puzzle, a problem to solve, a challenge. Let me at it!

But. Who or what is truly doing the work and is it my job to tackle every baffling hurdle? Is it really my mind or my thoughts? Maybe it's my ego, believing itself to be intelligent enough by itself to conquer the latest dilemma. I have never, ever come to a realization or conclusion or found an "ah-ha" moment without something greater shining through. When that lightbulb illuminates, my first response is "Oh my! Thank You!" Stopping to express gratitude where it's due: God, Source, Higher Power, Universal Intelligence. The inspiration did not, I'm pretty certain, come from me, my ability or my ego's inflated confidence and expertise. I am limited. The Universe is not and that's precisely the energy required to push past the sticky points.

Reminders are needed because my mind thinks itself to be pretty darn special and fully capable without any assistance. It is not, my mind is wrong and here is where the words are inserted: Not My Job. Stop, cease, quit taking up valuable space and energy on problems outside of my control.

Fine, so what is my job? I need to do something because this problem is a doozy and I cannot just ignore it. Of course, we must participate and initiate the motion. We are a part of the creative process...a "part" of the process.

1. Ask. Plant the seed. Ask for help, guidance, clarity. Ask with sincerity. Ask from your heart, your very center.

2. Leave it alone. Allow the movement and momentum to gain some muscle. Don't drown the problem by continuing to over-think. Additional, persistant, repeating thoughts are not helpful. They only delay the outcome and hinder the evolution of solution. A watched pot never boils. Get on with your life and engage in other activities and move to #3

3. Trust. Trust in the power you have invited. Take a cue from nature. The seed rests underground in the darkness, gathering energy, nutrients and strength before undertaking the effort to push toward the light. The seed, the ask, needs this rest, this time, to assemble the power required. There is nothing to be done, no action can speed this along.

4. Not My Job. When your mind refuses to cooperate and sinks back into the role of driver, deliver these three words: Not My Job. Get out of the way and stop blocking the sunlight. If you've not been able to solve this problem and have given it up to the Higher Power and asked for help, then let help come. Do not ask for assistance and then push the request aside because you're too impatient, too short-sighted, too doubtful. Not Your Job. Refer to #3 again.

Your "ask" was your job. Now is not the time for second-guessing or trying to outsmart the Universe. The seed will not sprout if you keep poking at it, checking in and offering well-meaning, but essentially growth inhibiting additional suggestions. The seed knows what to do without your interference. True.

Distract yourself with positive activities and thoughts. Pick something you can control and make improvements. Play the "focus" game. Turn in the direction of a good feeling, something beautiful and working well in your life or spend time researching and working on a habit you are trying to upgrade.

I find these three words very calming and they re-set my focus quite quickly and in a positive way. Write them down and post where you can see them. With practice, your thoughts will not bother repeating the old patterns and, surprisingly, there's not much protest when the three words are required and interjected. The words don't beat up or berate my current thoughts; they lovingly remind me to turn toward serenity and my mind easily accepts this more peaceful state. Grateful for the relief from burdensome worry.

Relax a little. Trust a lot. Watch the sunrise and imbibe the wisdom of Nature. The rest is disruptive distraction and Not Your Job.